Perseverance

Perseverance does not mean "perfect." It means that we keep going. We do not quit when we find that we are not yet mature and that there is a long journey still before us... perseverance is not resignation, putting up with things the way they are, staying in the same old rut year after year after year, or being a doormat for people to wipe their feet on. Endurance is not a desperate hanging on but a traveling from strength to strength... Perseverance is triumphant and alive. 

Eugene Peterson

Hoping Against Hope, or Lack of It!

I am sitting here wondering here my life's headed. My mind is filled with questions. Will I make it in life? Will I be able to be that person I know I can be? Will the snow storm finally pass and the sun shines on my life? Will I be able to master the strength of character and live off wisdom? These and many others. 

One thing is for sure. I can't afford to give up. Nor can I doubt my abilities. Next to God, I rely on my hope for a better future and my ability to create that better future. However, this certainty about my hope and ability is tested every single day by unforeseen mini-crises. Hanging becomes unbearable. Finding meaning as painful as the labour of giving birth. Tomorrow becomes dreadful. Loneliness erects its tent to stay. Love seems distant like the stone age. It's as if I am without family or anyone. The cold in my heart is more severe than the winter outside. Anger, bitterness and despair are all waiting at the door of my heart to invade it. What is my guard? Will I remain strong or sane?

I must dig deep. I must 'hope against' or lack of it. I must find the sun behind the clouds. I must find light within. I must run when can or crawl when I can't. Whichever way, I must keep on moving. 

Some years ago, I had some personal crisis. What I am going through now is by far the worst. The difference is this time I will pass right through it with my integrity intact. I want to believe that, when the dust settles, victory will be mine. In a strange way, I am grateful for this hardship. It revealed to me a lot about myself. Lots of weaknesses and some promising developments. I hope I am being prepared for something better and bigger. 

The Unbearable Easiness of a Happy Life

Have you ever felt the pain of wasted opportunities, years and talent? Was the pain so acute to the point of robbing you your sleep? Were you an inch close to despair, even suicide? What was it about?

I think that this is much related to the sense of having failed, having no reason to go on in life. You have come face to face with the consequences of all your bad choices in life. The times you spent running after instant gratifications led you to that moment in life. At this moment, you admit to yourself, most probably for the first time, "I've utterly failed." The pain of hanging on is so unbearable that you contemplate how to end it all. But then, you hear a soft voice from within the recesses of your being that says, "Wait and see!" Though confusing, the voice is convincing. It sustains you through the unbearable pain. If you are courageous, you choose to "wait and see". You drag yourself in life to the next day. 

What brought the pain? Failure? Yes, but it is more than that. It is caused by neglecting your priorities day in and day out. It came about because of a conscious choice, or a series of choices, not to live by what you know to be right. The unbearable pain of 'failing' is a cumulative effect of your bad choices in the mundane of daily life. Those times you did the wrong things, the times you postponed the things that needed to be done, the times you lowered your standards and lived like a beast, the times you ran after vain things are all responsible. 

What is the way out of this? First, take responsibility for the mess. Admit that it's all your mess. Second, as you created the mess, start cleaning it. Take control of today and start thinking, being and acting in the way you know to be right. Then, discipline yourself to act at all times in this new manner. Don't slip up! If you do, vow never to repeat it and move on. Don't dwell on your slip up. Don't beat yourself too long. As the mess was not the result of a day of bad choices, the new life cannot be mastered overnight. Be patient with yourself. 

Respect yourself. Don't let others to treat you as a door mat. Be gentle with others. When one mistreats you, make it clear to them it's unacceptable. Do it with love. Above all, have a clear idea of who you are and who you want to be. At the end of the day, it's not what others think of that matters. It's what you think of yourself. Let your outer world resemble the beauty of your inner world. 

ABBA ADELMO

I've always thought and believed that when you hear the death of a friend, you'd start crying or at least sobbing. But that was not what happened to me yesterday when I heard the shocking news about the death of the man who taught me the ABC's of Christianity. He died. He is no more. He is, but not here anymore. He's somewhere else. That fact by itself is mind boggling. I will never see him again. I will never receive the letter I was expecting to receive from every single day of the past few weeks. He will never write letters or books. The only thing he will be able to do would be to praise and worship for eternity the God whom he so dearly loved all his life. 

Oh, death! Until it happens to someone who is close like Fr. Adelmo, or a family member, we don't think of it as it really doesn't exist. And it just comes out of nowhere to upset us. It takes the one we love to the country 'no traveler comes back from'. They go and they are no more. Not here with us anymore. We will never hear their voice or songs again. We will never look into their smiling eyes. We will never hear about the pain of their soul. What is it really? If he is gone, why do I have this weired feeling that he is still here? Why do I 'feel' him? Are you here, Fr. Adelmo? Should I wait for your reply to my letter? Is it coming? Did you happen to write it for me because you don't want to keep me waiting for eternity to hear from you? Will I never find you in your office? Will I never hear your strong deep voice when I knock at your door? 

I remember all the stories, both funny and wise, that you told me. Your homilies, too. I never told you this. I will tell you now. You are the first person who told me it is good to have my own library at home. This inspired me so much that I invest so much money on books. Now when I look at the shelf filled with books, I will always remember you. It is strange. You just said that simple sentence. You may not even remember saying it. But now, my highly treasured property is my books. I came to know great people because of you: St. Thomas Aquinas, Thomas Merton, Henri Nowen, Julia of Norwich, .... 

Do you remember Father the times we used to go for coffee? I never saw you doing this anyone. But you did it with me. You even trusted me to the point of giving me permission to go through your personal diaries for the book that, now, we will never be able publish. Yeah, and when you came to speak to my students at SOS and Beza college? I remember it so well. Even Abay and Abubakar invited you to their classes, too. My students loved you so much because you are funny. 

I salute you, Fr. Adelmo. I salute you for serving God for over half a century faithfully. I salute the work you did for all the young people in Ethiopia, Uganda, Kenya and Sudan. I salute you for being honest to yourself and for resisting the conformity that is so prevalent in the world. I salute you for the books you wrote. I salute you for your love of prayer. (I remember how you used to get up very early in the morning and sing. I can still hear you.) I salute you for keeping your promise to Mother Teresa and for celebrating Mass to her sisters faithfully for many many years. I salute you for all the support you rendered to the poor. 

I know you are at rest. I just want to say, May your rest be with God. 

Are You a Robot or a Person?

I was just asked the following question, "Does the decision of another person not affect you?" and I decided to explore my own thoughts with my blog. The first answer that came to my mind was, "Yes, it surely does." On the second thought I found out that the decisions of other people have usually affected me because I am not as strong as I want to be. It also affect me because we are all one, that means we are eternally connected by human fiber. That is why a single act of goodness is a blessing to the human family. And a single evil act makes the human family less human. This is not a mere grandiose statement. I truly believe that what it is. 

Exploring the idea further, I have an all together different set of opinions about it. I believe that you are primarily affected by your own thoughts, words and actions. When you think, speak and act pure, your life is pure.  When you entertain any impure thought, or speak unbecomingly, or act like a beast, then again your life will mirror just that. The truth in the adage is true: "You reap what you sow." 

You may ask, "OK, but people through their words and actions can ruin your life." That's right, too. They do this all the time. The question, however, is, "Do they ruin your life because they have power over you or is it because you gave them the power?" The world has plenty of examples to prove both sides of the argument. But I believe that if you choose to have power over yourself, i.e., if you have 'self-mastery', in thought, word and action, you will be surprised to find that people actually have less power over you. People's power over you is as much as you choose to give them. No one has power over the person who has power over himself. No one can ruin the person who has his life consciously in his own hands. 

You see the problem is you don't take full responsibility over your life. It is easy to be led than to make your own destiny. It is easy to blame others than to say I screwed my life myself. When 'they' are in charge of your life, then 'they' are free to do what they wish with it. 'They' can make you happy, or sad, or angry, or delighted, or depressed as they wish. But if you are in control of your life (which is to be in control of what you think, say and do), then you are the boss. Nobody can play with you pressing buttons like a robot toy. 

It is easy to change. It is tougher to keep the change consistently. This is how I think you should go about it. 

1. Make a DECISION never to be anyone's toy. Be ware not to be your parents', or your spouse's, or your friends' toy. 
2. Learn to CONTROL your thoughts since "act is the blossom of thought, and joy and suffering are its fruits."
3. DISCIPLINE yourself consistently until you become your own person in thought, word and act. 
4. When you FAIL to do so, as it will happen more frequently-especially the first few months, pick yourself up and move on taking your lessons from what happened. Keep on keeping on!

"MAN IS MADE OR UNMADE BY HIMSELF."

Principles

To be successful in life and to enjoy more of life, it's absolutely indispensable to have a set of principles as a guide. The principles need not be too many. They are only a few that we can't afford to break them. It happens that we don't live up to them. When this happens, they come to our rescue by reminding us of our priorities and set the whole course anew again. 

What does a life without principles like? It is like a plane without a pilot. Not only marked by the way it's flying, but it is also fatal to the passenger. Life without principles as a guide is like a plane without a pilot. It goes nowhere but crashes down destroying everyone and everything. It is also marked by the haphazard actions that fill it to its brim. 

Life when lived with principles is tough at the start. It is like anything worth doing. Then after much effort and labor it gets easier and becomes more enjoyable. Defeat is when you throw your principles out of the window believing it is impossible to follow them. If you persist to pass the most difficult phase of implementing them, then you will be shocked to find how easy it is to live by them. It is here that you start to reap the rich harvest they bring you. 

I believe this why Socrates said, "Unexamined life is not worth living." Formulating your principles call for a depth analysis of your personality, your strengths and weaknesses. It also helps you to take your life in your own hands so that you stop blaming other people and circumstances that are without. Your principles demand that you ACT instead of REACT to people or circumstances. They are statements of what you are going to do, rather than how you are going to REACT  to things that happen to you.

Now, take the next few minutes and write down your principles. Vow to yourself by placing your signature at the end of your principles that you will keep every one of your principles NO MATTER WHAT. The effect takes of immediately. You begin to BE the person you set out to be.

What You Actually Have Is You

Hey, everybody. It's been a while since I last posted something. Hopefully, I'll remain faithful to my blog from today on.

These days, one truth revealed itself to me in an excruciating manner that resembles labour. I finally came to accept that in the most painful moments of my life I am alone. At the moment where I need the loving presence of others, I'm alone to face life's beatings. No family or friend was able to penetrate my hurting heart to comfort it. I had literally to go through it all by myself. And I told myself that the only one I have is me.

This revelation is not some sort of egoistical isolation of oneself, nor some sort of self-pity. It is a hard fact unsurfaced by life's reality. I've been taught by life in the way that I could understand I've to pull it together and be a man if I want to achieve anything worth while with my life. No one, I mean it-no one, will be there for you when you are going through the harshest things that can happen to your life. I don't feel at all the desire to close in on myself and hate people. Rather, what I feel is to live like a human and be courageous to face everyday mundane life without bitterness. 

Here are the lessons summarized:

1. Don't lower your standards to anyone, not even to wife or husband or any close person.

2. Stick to your guns.

3. Don't entertain negative thoughts about others and yourself.

4. Know that you have absolutely no reason not to be happy in life.

THE WOLF IN SHEEPSKIN

When you are betrayed by the person you have trusted for so long, it simply makes you cry. You cry like a baby whose mother went shopping. In fact, it does more than that. It breaks your heart and makes you more suspicious. You just don’t know whom to trust anymore. And if what the person did was more than betraying, you can imagine how heartbroken you can be.

All of this was what happen to me the past couple of weeks. One hurt after another came tumbling in from the person I trusted, loved and respected. “Am I so stupid and blind?” was the first question that came to my mind. When the act got under my skin after a while, it burnt me like a furnace. “Why, why, why?”

Then two more days later, I started to think more clearly and stopped reacting to what has been done to me and started to act consciously. I did things that were difficult to do but very rewarding. The actions that I took filled me with the peace I badly needed. It was at this moment that I took note of the lessons I learnt:

1.       Don’t open your heart too widely to anyone.

2.       Ask advice from people that you trust.

3.       Remember there is always some risk to this.

4.       Be willing to take the risk.

5.       Don’t panic and react to a tough situation.

6.       Take the time to be away from the hot spot, if not physically, mentally.

7.       Do good to the one who hurts you.

8.       Trust people.

9.       But don’t let people play with you the way they want.

10.   Mark your boundaries very clearly.

"FAITH IS THE VICTORY!"-In Overcoming Despair

INTRODUCTION

1. In this series I have attempted to show how faith in Jesus gives us
   the victory over such things as:
   a. Sin
   b. Anxiety
   c. Boredom
   d. Depression
   -- For I am persuaded that in overcoming the world and whatever it
      throws our way, "Faith Is The Victory!" - cf. 1Jn 5:4-5

2. Closely related to "depression" is the problem of "despair"...
   a. Those who are depressed are often in a state of despair as well
   b. Despair may be a cause for their depression, or at the least
      making it worse

3. As I hope to illustrate in this study...
   a. Despair (i.e., hopelessness) is a serious problem, not one to be
      taken lightly
   b. It is damaging to our health, our society, and our relationship
      with God
   -- Certainly Christians should seek to dispel despair in their 
      lives, and in the lives of those around them!

[Let me begin, then, by sharing some things I learned in my own study
on the subject of despair...]

I. UNDERSTANDING DESPAIR

   A. DESPAIR DEFINED...
      1. According to the American Heritage Dictionary:  To lose all
         hope; to be overcome by a sense of futility or defeat;
         complete loss of hope
      2. Synonyms for despair include hopelessness, despondency, 
         discouragement
      3. Mark Twain described despair as "...a time when one's spirit
         is subdued and sad, one knows not why; when the past seems a 
         storm-swept desolation, life a vanity and a burden, and the 
         future but a way to death."

   B. THE DANGER OF DESPAIR...
      1. Despair takes its toll on society
         a. According to researchers at the University of Missouri-
            Columbia Health Sciences Center, a lack of hope has been 
            linked to poor behavior in children
         b. As reported by Reuter's Leslie Lang, children with high 
            levels of hopelessness...
            1) Tended to engage in harmful and destructive behavior to 
               themselves and others
            2) Tended to be defiant, refusing to obey rules, take 
               turns, share, and skip school
         c. The researcher quoted indicated that hopelessness may be an
            indicator for children and teens who are prone to act in 
            anti-social or aggressive behavior
      2. Despair takes it toll on your physical health
         a. It can have the same detrimental effect on the heart as 
            smoking a pack of cigarettes, according to a study 
            published in the August, 1997, issue of Arteriosclerosis, 
            Thrombosis, and Vascular Biology,
         b. "a high level of hopelessness exacerbates the 
            atherosclerotic process in middle-aged men" (Dr. Susan A.
            Everson)
         c. I.e.,  it increases the thickness of the arterial walls
      3. Despair is certainly detrimental to one's spiritual health
         a. To be in despair is a slap in the face of God
            1) "He that despairs degrades God." (Owen Felltham, 
               1602-1668)
            2) "When you say a situation or a person is hopeless, you
               are slamming the door in the face of God." (Charles L.
               Allen, 1913- )
            3) "It is impossible for that man to despair who remembers
               that his Helper is omnipotent." (Jeremy Taylor, 
               1613-1667)
         b. To be in despair renders one ineffective in helping others:
            "He that is fallen cannot help him that is down." (unknown)

[The pervasiveness of despair in our society is reflected in the words
of Thoreau:  "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation."  But as
Clare Boothe Luce said, "There are no hopeless situations. There are 
only people who have grown hopeless about them."

Charles Swindoll has said that "Surrendering to despair is man's 
favorite pastime. God offers a better plan, but it takes effort to grab
it and faith to claim it."  With that I agree, and so now wish for us
to consider how...]

II. FAITH IN JESUS HELPS US TO OVERCOME DESPAIR

   A. JESUS PROVIDES HOPE FOR THE HOPELESS...
      1. Through His teachings...
         a. Telling us of God's providential care - Mt 6:30; 7:11;
            10:29-31
         b. Telling us of God's love for the lost - Lk 15:7; Jn 3:16-17
      2. Through His promises...
         a. Telling us of the abundant life He offers - Jn 4:13-14; 
            6:35; 10:10
         b. His promise of the resurrection He offers - Jn 11:23-27
         c. His promise of His return and the place He is preparing 
            - Jn 14:1-3
      3. Through His actions...
         a. His death on the cross provides the hope of our 
            forgiveness!
         b. His resurrection provides the hope for our own 
            resurrection!
      -- Jesus is truly "our hope"! - cf. 1Ti 1:1

   B. THROUGH FAITH IN JESUS, THE CHRISTIAN...
      1. Has hope in God regarding the resurrection - Ac 24:15; cf. 
         1Pe 1:3
      2. Can rejoice in hope regarding the glory to come - Ro 5:1-2
      3. Use the Scriptures as a constant replenisher of hope - Ro 15:4
      4. Can abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit - Ro 15:13;
         Ga 5:5
      5. Has the hope of salvation as a "helmet" to protect our minds 
         - 1Th 5:8
      6. Can look forward to the "blessed hope and glorious appearing
         of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ" - Tit 2:13-14

CONCLUSION

1. It has been said that "Life with Christ is an endless hope, without
   him a hopeless end."
   a. For those who are in Christ, they have every reason to hope!
   b. For those outside of Christ, one can understand why there is 
      often despair!

2. For those in Christ, we are charged to hold fast to our hope...
   a. "but Christ as a Son over His own house, whose house we are if 
      we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm 
      to the end." - He 3:6
   b. "Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering,
      for He who promised is faithful." - He 10:23
   -- And for good reason, for "This hope we have as an anchor of the
      soul, both sure and steadfast..." - He 6:19

Through faith in Jesus, we can hold fast to our hope, and gain the 
victory!

            God be praised, that to believing souls
               Gives light in darkness, comfort in despair!

                        WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE (1564-1616)

Source: Unknown

Free Will

My free will is often tested by me in many different ways. Sometimes I say I'd not do something then the desire to do it arises. The result is a conflict with my self. Shall I do it or not? It's horrible, but it is essential for your own self-respect.

I believe the way you use your free will affects your self-esteem. If you are a man who does what he says, then you trust yourself, and hence, you have a better self-esteem. On the other hand, if you are a man who says he will do something and doesn't keep his word, then obviously you have a low self-esteem.

The best news is that we can train our self-will to become stronger. We make stronger by using it. The way we use it is by adhering to what we said we will do. For example, one who said he will stop smoking should not smoke. If that kills him, he should be happy to die than to smoke. This is a true decision. You decide and you are ready to die for your decision. Do this often. Soon it becomes a second nature.

I decided to walk my talk. What about you?

Champions Know Adversity is the Catalyst of Mental Toughness

"If it weren't for the dark days, we wouldn't know what it is to walk in the light."

Earl Campbell (professional football player)

Champions believe if you remove the adversity, you remove the victory. As a result, they tend to view adversity as a challenge through which learning and growing occurs. Their world view is evident in the way they describe the adversities they face. While average people choose the path of least resistance, world-class performers operate at a higher level of awareness. They understand that stress and struggle are the key factors in becoming mentally tough. While average people watch television and hang out at happy hour, the great ones continue to push themselves mentally and physically to the point of exhaustion. Only then will you see them in rest and recovery situations. Adversity, to average people equal, pain. Adversity, to world-class performers, is their mental training ground. It's how they become mentally tough. Average people scorn adversity. Those who are world class don't welcome adversity; yet they see it as the ultimate catalyst for mental growth, as well as the contrast needed to recognize the beauty of life. 

(177 Mental Toughness Secrets)

In Case You Miss Them

                                       

                                                 

                                                 

                                       

Man's Deeper Questionings

The world of today reveals itself as at once powerful and weak, capable of achieving the best or the worst. There lies open before it the way to freedom or slavery, progress or regression, brotherhood or hatred. In addition, man is becoming aware that it is for himself to give the right direction to the forces that he has himself awakened, forces that can be his master or his servant. He therefore puts questions to himself. 

The tensions disturbing the world of today are in fact related to a more fundamental tension rooted in the human heart. In man himself many elements are in conflict with each other. On one side, he has experience of his many limitations as a creature. On the other, he knows that there is no limit to his aspirations, and that he is called to a higher kind of life. 

Many things compete for his attention, but he is always compelled to make a choice among them, and to renounce some. What is more, in his weakness and sinfulness he often does what he does not want to do, and fails to do what he would like to do. In consequence, he suffers from a conflict within himself, and this in turn gives rise to so many great tensions in society. 

Very many people, infected as they are with a materialistic way of life, cannot see this dramatic state of affairs in all its clarity, or at least are prevented from giving thought to it because of the unhappiness that they themselves experience. 

Many think that they can find peace in the different philosophies that are proposed. 

Some look for complete and genuine liberation for man from man's efforts alone. They are convinced that the coming kingdom of man on earth will satisfy all the desires of his heart. 

There are those who despair of finding any meaning in life: they commend the boldness of those who deny all significance to human existence in itself, and seek to impose a total meaning on it only from within themselves.

 

But in the face of the way in which the world is developing today there is an ever increasing number of people who are asking the most fundamental questions or are seeing them with a keener awareness: What is man? What is the meaning of pain, of evil, of death, which still persist in spite of such great progress? What is the use of those successes, achieved at such a cost? What can man contribute to society, what can he expect from society? What will come after this life on earth?

The Church believes that Christ died and rose for all, and can give man light and strength through his Spirit to fulfill his highest calling; his is the only name under heaven in which men can be saved. 

So too the Church believes that the center and goal of all human history is found in her Lord and Master. 

The Church also affirms that underlying all changes there are many things that do not change; they have their ultimate foundation in Christ, who is the same yesterday, today and for ever. 

(The Second Vatican Council)

Things You Can Do (by Scott Hughes)

Most people aren't Warriors, and I'm fine with it. Most people do things that don't make sense, and I'm fine with it. I've learned to accept the non-sense that fills this world. (Part of being a Warrior is accepting that most other people are not Warriors, and accepting them.) Still, the point is that people do things that don't make sense. They whine, complain, and cry over problems they can easily change. They get depressed over problems they cause for themselves.

For example, lazy people often whine that they don't make more money. Selfish people complain that they don't have more friends. Many people sabotage all their romantic relationships and then complain that they don't have a lover.

Granted, sometimes when something bad happens to a person it's purely bad luck. For example, you could be sitting in your well-built home while reading the newspaper and a tornado could tear your home up.

However, usually when you don't like what's happening in your life, it's your own damn fault. It's your fault if you're fat, lazy, uneducated, lonely, etc.

In the following, I list 71 things that you can do to be more successful. You choose to do them or not. If you choose not to do these things, then you have no right to complain about your problems; your problems are your fault!

1. Stop watching television.
2. Stop eating fast food.
3. Stop eating pizza and fried foods.
4. Stop driving places that you could easily walk to.
5. Read at least 1 book a month.
6. Take classes in what interests you or your vocation.
7. Work enough to support yourself, and if needed get a new job or second job to make enough to support yourself. Never stick with a job that doesn't pay enough to support yourself no matter how much you work.
8. Pay off your debts and don't go in debt. You can pay off your debts if you avoid needless expenses, such as cable, overpriced clothes, impractical decorations, unhealthy snacks, jewelry, etcetera.
9. Don't buy a car on finance, and don't buy an expensive car if a cheaper one that works is available.
10. Wake up early, and get all your work done as quickly as possible. That includes household chores, as well as your employment.
11. Drink alcohol less or quit.
12. Do drugs less or quit.
13. Don't smoke cigarettes.
14. Don't eat foods with high fructose corn syrup.
15. Don't drink soda.
16. Don't eat sugary foods at all.
17. Don't drink more than 1 glass of juice per day.
18. Stand up straight and have good posture.
19. Look people in the eyes when you talk to them.
20. Smile.
21. Be polite.
22. Keep your promises.
23. Wear a watch, if you can afford it.
24. Eat breakfast.
25. If you eat cereal at any time, choose your cereal based on healthiness not tastiness.
26. Exercise at least 3 days per week.
27. Walk often.
28. Always write with correct spelling and grammar.
29. Never speak worse about a person behind their back than you do to their face. (Feel free to say nicer things about a person behind their back than to their face.)
30. Don't gossip and don't have a big mouth.
31. Never judge other people harsher than you judge yourself.
32. Make New Years resolutions, but make one every day instead of every year.
33. Volunteer.
34. Forgive, but never forget.
35. Don't have skeletons in your closet.
36. Keep as few secrets as reasonably possible.
37. Despite the rule before this one, keep your friends' secrets.
38. Politely tell people that you will not betray your friends' trust, when you are asked about their secrets and such.
39. Volunteering (i.e. activism) is more important than voting. If you can do both, good for you. If you only have time for one, volunteer instead of voting. It makes more of a difference.
40. Privately question your own values.
41. Avoid questioning other people's values, especially in public.
42. Listen more than you talk.
43. Use a journal to count how many calories you consume per day.
44. Use a journal to count how many calories you burn per day.
45. If you want to lose weight, burn slightly more than you consume. If you want to gain weight, consume slightly more than you burn. If you are happy with your weight, try to burn the same amount as you consume.
46. Weigh yourself daily at the same time(s).
47. Write your daily weight down in a journal.
48. Never allow the police to search you, your car, or your belongings if you do not have something to hide.
49. Never tell other people that you think they or something they are doing is immoral or sinful.
50. Keep your moral values and religion to yourself. Use them to direct your own actions.
51. Ask people how they are often and listen to their answer.
52. Laugh at other people's jokes, but not your own.
53. Shower at least once per day.
54. Wash your hands, even if you aren't an employee.
55. Take care of the elderly, which includes spending time with them and talking to them.
56. Avoid going places where you need to be waited on.
57. Wait on yourself wherever possible.
58. Make your friends look good.
59. Avoid lying.
60. Don't pretend to be better than you are. Don't pretend to be more successful, popular, etcetera.
61. Treat other people as if they are better than they are. Treat them as if they are more successful, popular, etcetera.
62. Don't brag about your talents. Instead, surprise people with them when they just happen to be called upon.
63. Sit up straight.
64. Keep your house clean.
65. If you have either of them, keep your car and office clean.
66. Stretch daily. (I do Yoga most mornings.)
67. Dance.
68. Take dancing lessons if you could use improvement.
69. Ask other people (e.g. your friends, your co-workers, your boss, etc.) what their favorite book is, and read it.
70. Ask their favorite song or band, and listen to it.
71. Ask their favorite movie, and watch it.
Extras:
72. Don't be camera shy.
73. When your alarm goes off in the morning (if you use one), don't press snooze.
74. Make a budget and follow it.
Suggestions from visitors:
75. Say "I love you" often to the people you feel this way about.
76. Always turning off lights when leaving a room, unless of course there are others are in the room. For that matter, conserving any unnecessary electricity usage is key to the future of humanity.

Something to Ponder

If you woke you this morning with more health than illness, you are more

blessed than the million who will not survive this week.

If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of

imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation, you are

ahead of 500 million people in the world.

If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest,

torture, or death, you are more blessed than 

three billion people in the world.

If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead,

and a place to sleep, you are richer than 75% of this world.

If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish

someplace, you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

If your parents are alive and married, you are very rare.

If you hold up your head with a smile on your face and are truly thankful,

you are blessed because the majority can, but most do not.

If you can hold someone's hand, hug them or even touch them on the shoulder,

you are blessed because you can offer a healing touch

If you can read this message you've just received a double blessing in that

someone was thinking of you, and furthermore, you are more blessed than over

two billion people in the world that cannot read at all.

Have a good day, count your blessings, and pass this along to remind

everyone else how blessed we all are.

(Anonymous) 

Life: Explained

 

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.

"Not very long," answered the Mexican.

"But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?" asked the American.

The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.

The American asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

"I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs. I have a full life."

The American interrupted, "I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat."

"And after that?" asked the Mexican.

"With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge new enterprise."

"How long would that take?" asked the Mexican.

"Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years," replied the American.

"And after that?"

"Afterwards? Well my friend, that's when it gets really interesting," answered the American, laughing. "When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!"

"Millions? Really? And after that?" asked the Mexican.

"After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends."

And the moral of this story is: ......... Know where you're going in life... you may already be there.

What wants to change?

"The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem."

-- Theodore Rubin

Our lives really begin to change when we learn to shift our perspective on ‘problems.’

From the spiritual perspective, problems offer our best path to growth. Like it or not, pain gets our attention. Pain also challenges the ego's perception that it is in complete control of life. This opens the door for soul’s guidance.

If we want to be rid of the pain, we must do the work that leads us to greater consciousness. Paradoxically, we can only get rid of the pain by moving through it.

The next time you feel “poor me,” stop and ask, “What needs to change? What does my soul want me to learn?”

“No one can go back and make a brand new start. Anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.”

-- Source Unknown

(The Inner Journey)

Happiness

Happiness is like a butterfly;

                                the more you chase it,                                                                        

       the more it will elude you,

but if you turn your attention to other things,

it will come and sit softly on your shoulder...

                
                                                  Thoreau 

The Earth's Oldest Trees

My Career Test Result

Career Inventory Test Results Extroversion |||||||||||| 33% Emotional Stability ||||||||||||||| 50% Orderliness |||||||||||||||||||||||| 76% Altruism |||||||||||||||||| 56% Inquisitiveness |||||||||||||||||| 60%  You are a Guide, possible professions include - career counselor, psychologist, educational consultant, special education teacher, librarian, artist, playwright, novelist/poet, editor/art director, information-graphics, designer, HRM manager, merchandise planner, environmental lawyer, marketer, job analyst, mental health counselor, dietitian/nutritionist, research, educational consultant, architects, interpreter/translator.

Take Free Career Test
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The Hairdresser Saint?

Born in 1766, Pierre Toussaint was a slave in his native Haiti. His owner, Jean Berard, taught the young man how to read and write. When slave revolts broke out, the Berard family brought him with them when they fled to New York City in 1787. 

Shortly after their arrival, Mr. Berard died and Pierre became the main support of Mrs. Berard and the household. He studied to become a hairdresser and soon developed a large clientele among the rich. Upon her deathbed in 1807, Mrs. Berard gave Pierre his freedom. 

Pierre married, and he and his wife purchased the freedom of many Haitian slaves. Once the refugees arrived in New York, the couple helped them find jobs, gave them money, and cared for them when they were sick-often bringing them into their home. 

The Toussaints were childless but often took care of abandoned children, giving them a home and opening a school to help the children learn a trade. They provided financial support for the Oblate Sisters of Providence (a religious order for black women), the first New York City Catholic school for black children, and an orphanage begun in 1817 by a fellow New Yorker, Mother Elizabeth Seton. 

Pierre died June 30, 1853, at the age of 87. He is buried behind the main altar of St. Patrick Cathedral in New York. 

On December 18, 1996, Pope John Paul II declared Pierre Toussaint "venerable", a step towards eventual canonization. Toussaint is considered a founder of Catholic charities work in the United States. 

February is Black History Month in the United States. 

(From The Little Black Book)

Let Us Show Each Other God's Generosity

Recognize to whom you owe the fact that you exist, that you breathe, that you understand, that you are wise, and, above all, that you know God and hope for the kingdom of heaven and the vision of glory, now darkly and as in a mirror but then with greater fullness and purity. You have been made a son of God, coheir with Christ. Where did you get all this, and from whom?

Let me turn to what is of less importance: the visible world around us. What benefactor has enabled you to look out upon the beauty of the sky, the sun in its course, the circle of the moon, the countless number of stars, with the harmony and order that are theirs, like the music of a harp? Who has blessed you with rain, with the art of husbandry, with different kinds of food, with the arts, with houses, with laws, with states, with a life of humanity and culture, with friendship and the easy familiarity of kinship?

Who has given you dominion over animals, those that are tame and those that provide you with food? Who has made you lord and master of everything on earth? In short, who has endowed you with all that makes man superior to all other living creatures?

Is it not God who asks you now in your turn to show yourself generous above all other creatures and for the sake of all other creatures? Because we have received from him so many wonderful gifts, will we not be ashamed to refuse him this one thing only, our generosity? Though he is God and Lord he is not afraid to be known as our Father. Shall we for our part repudiate those who are our kith and kin?

Brethren and friends, let us never allow ourselves to misuse what has been given us by God's gift. If we do, we shall hear Saint Peter say: Be ashamed of yourselves for holding on to what belongs to someone else. Resolve to imitate God's justice, and no one will be poor. Let us not labor to heap up and hoard riches while others remain in need. If we do, the prophet Amos will speak out against us with sharp and threatening words: Come now, you that say: When will the new moon be over, so that we may start selling? When will sabbath be over, so that we may start opening our treasures? 

Let us put into practice the supreme and primary law of God. He sends down rain on just and sinful alike, and causes the sun to rise on all without distinction. To all earth's creatures he has given the broad earth, the springs, the rivers and the forests. He has given the air to the birds, and the waters to those who live in water. He has given abundantly to all the basic needs of life, not as a private possession, not restricted by law, not divided by boundaries, but as common to all, amply and in rich measure. His gifts are not deficient in any way, because he wanted to give equality of blessing to equality of worth, and to show the abundance of his generosity. 

(From a sermon by Saint Gregory of Nazianzen, bishop)