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Thursday, April 10, 2014
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
RESPECT-What Is It?
I remember posting about respect. I'm back at it. It's quite clear to me that this is important to me, I mean being respected. I'd like to share my feelings and thoughts about being respected from a different perspective tonight.
Yes, like any human being I'd like to be respected. However, I don't seem to command respect from others. I'm fully responsible for it. If others don't see me worthy of their respect, then it's all my fault. This is not what I want to write about though.
What I want to write about is my 'obsession' to be respected. Obsession might be quite a strong word. But I'll leave it .Why do I seek respect? Why don't I say, 'To hell with other people's judgement?' And that's exactly what I've decided to do from this moment on wards. I thought about it for some minutes and the futility of being disturbed by other people's opinion of me dawned on me as it has never done before. I'm focusing on the wrong end of the stick.
I've been disturbed by other's opinion of me, perhaps, because of lack of self-esteem. May be I didn't see myself as worthy of respect. As everybody knows the world treats you as you expect to be treated. That has changed now. I feel differently about myself. I've immense pride in who I am, or at least, I desire to. And it's a real desire.
So to hell with what other's think of me. I don't REALLY CARE! Let me just be worthy of my own respect. Let me live my life the way I know is worthy of me. People will always judge me. The question is whether I agree with their judgement or not. If I know who I am, their judgement is a farce. It's no point.
Secondly, it's far more important to focus whether I respect and treat others the way I want to be treated. This is the Golden Rule or The St Francis Rule. (I just made up this name now to refer to his famous prayer.)
Now, my yoke is light. I'm care free. People you've all the right to judge and lable me. I don't give a rat's ass.
Monday, February 24, 2014
I Got to Love These Things!
A few days ago I posted a short piece entitled 'I am responsible.' I'm still responsible for everything in my life. This doesn't mean, however, to other people's actions. I'm not responsible. My responsibility lies in my choice towards their action. People are people, not robots, and hence, they chose to do stuff. They may be unreasonable, unfair, prejudiced, rude, and so on. This is their choice. My choice is what lies between their acts and my response.
When people wrong me, I should be delighted (i.e. ideally). I'd love to love the opportunity to practise choosing my own response regardless of what they do. I'd prefer to use it as a gym for my emotional strength and character formation. It's the people who do unpleasant things towards me who enhance my growth, if I act and choose my response wisely.
Instead of being offended, view it as it is-a wrong act. Have the right perspective, namely I'm the master of my own thoughts and actions, not another persons. Practise self-control in these situations and strengthen your emotional muscles. Remain cheerful and cordial. Remember, if you let their actions affect your behaviour negatively, you miss the learning opportunity.
Friday, February 21, 2014
Begin With the End in Mind
What would I want people to say on my funeral? What would I love my daughter say on that day of departure?
I'd love to hear her say how a great loving dad I was and how she learned from me so many lessons that she found useful in her every day life. I'd love her to say how I taught her by my example more than with my words. I'd love her to say that I was her best friend and that she's going to miss me. I'd love her to say that we had fun together, travelled together, and did so many crazy things together. I'd love her to acknowledge that I made it easier for her to find her life's calling. I'd love to hear that my best gift for her was my love for her. I'd love to know that because I was her daddy she is a confident, high achieving, wise, knowledge loving and a woman of integrity.
I'd love people to say that I genuinely loved them and forgave them. I laughed with them and shared their sufferings. I listened and listened to them. I respected them. I didn't preach to them with my words. I was a light to them.
I'd love to know that because of the way I lived and worked people believed in themselves and their true powers. I'd love to hear them say things like, he always said that if I could be this or that, you could also be that because you are a lot smarter than I am.
I'd love people whom I helped with my money to say that they learned compassion from me. They learned the true use of wealth, to be a blessing to others. They learned that if they change their lives, the lives of others would change because of them.
Thursday, February 20, 2014
I am Responsible!
These past couple of years have been very instrumental in learning a lot about who I really am as opposed to who I say I was. So many things happened. All of the bad ones that come to pass were of my own making. I've learned that in hindsight. I'd this chronic tendency of blaming it all on others, while I sympathized with my short comings.
It really feels like waking up from sleep. I can't believe I was that kind of person and didn't even know it. After all that's how ignorance is, like sleep. When you are not awake (mentally/spiritually), you are sleep walking through
life. Then life hits you hard-BOOOM! And you wake up.
The waking up part is enlightening, obviously. However, it's not easy. I was so used to sleep walking that I don't know how to walk while awake. I remember this line from Julian Cameroon, "Going sane feels just like going insane." How true! I'd to learn the skills-personal, social, business, etc.- that I needed to function in this new reality. Learning is arduous. The fruit is long in coming. Habits are hard to break. (Sometimes, I feel there are two people living in me.)
I'm thrilled that I now know that I am responsible for where I am in life and what happened in my life. (This admission has within itself another admission, "I was (also) irresponsible.") I'm now able to catch myself in the old mode of thinking. I'm able to choose some of my thoughts, and hence, some of my actions. But I've a long way to go. I'm only a baby of few days of age.
It really feels like waking up from sleep. I can't believe I was that kind of person and didn't even know it. After all that's how ignorance is, like sleep. When you are not awake (mentally/spiritually), you are sleep walking through
life. Then life hits you hard-BOOOM! And you wake up.
The waking up part is enlightening, obviously. However, it's not easy. I was so used to sleep walking that I don't know how to walk while awake. I remember this line from Julian Cameroon, "Going sane feels just like going insane." How true! I'd to learn the skills-personal, social, business, etc.- that I needed to function in this new reality. Learning is arduous. The fruit is long in coming. Habits are hard to break. (Sometimes, I feel there are two people living in me.)
I'm thrilled that I now know that I am responsible for where I am in life and what happened in my life. (This admission has within itself another admission, "I was (also) irresponsible.") I'm now able to catch myself in the old mode of thinking. I'm able to choose some of my thoughts, and hence, some of my actions. But I've a long way to go. I'm only a baby of few days of age.
Sunday, February 16, 2014
BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!
There may not be a single soul who sees the pearl in your being. There may not be anyone who gives you the attention you crave. There may not be anyone who, for a moment, believes that there's greatness ahead of you. There is, however, one sure thing: you got have the faith and belief in yourself. God, who lives within, believes in you and your repay his faith by believing in yourself.
So have faith in yourself every moment of every day.
So have faith in yourself every moment of every day.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Here and Now
What is life? Yes, that's right. Many have tried to define it, or better to put it into words. All of them just tried their best, but couldn't find a comprehensive description for it. How could they? Isn't life more than words? Moreover, what is experienced in the deepest recesses of our being is usually indescribable. When it matter most, we are at loss with words. We'd rather show it. We cry, or beam with light, or jump up and down in ecstasy.
Am I going to try to put what life is in words? Nope. I am too small for that. I just want to talk about what I learnt living life in my own simple, and often stupid way. In life 'pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.' In life many heartbreaking things can happen. But life offers the remedy as well. Life is lived in the here and now.
Am I going to try to put what life is in words? Nope. I am too small for that. I just want to talk about what I learnt living life in my own simple, and often stupid way. In life 'pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.' In life many heartbreaking things can happen. But life offers the remedy as well. Life is lived in the here and now.
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